Every time there is a glitch in Facebook privacy people complain their confidentiality has been violated.  So I have solved the Facebook privacy issue.  Are you ready?  Here it is:

If you want to keep something private then don’t put it on Facebook.  Period!

Here’s the thing about social networks – they’re social.  Facebook is not the place to have an online chat with your secret lover.  If you want to keep your affair private then do what people use to do and have a “third rate romance low rent rendezvous” at a seedy motel.  And with foreclosures at an all time high there are plenty of abandoned buildings and empty luxury condos to carry on your shenanigans.

And if you are going to do something sleazy and hypocritical then you’re only going to make things worse by trying to justify it on Facebook.  Let’s say you’re an anti-Gay activists who uses your credentials as a doctor to help push homophobic policy.  But you secretly have a thing for rent boys giving you massages while in the nude performing a move called the “long stroke”.  And say your name is Dr. George Rekers, co-founder of the Family Research Council which under the guise of religion leads the charge to discriminate against Gay people.  When you get caught with your hand in the “rent boy” cookie jar then don’t post psycho-babble on your Facebook page that makes you seem certifiable insane.

Click here to read George Rekers’s Facebook post in response to getting caught spending 10 days on a European vacation with a male hooker.  And I challenge you to try and read it with a straight face.  (Sorry, it had to be said.)

By the way, if you are a closet homosexual like George Rekers then you should not parade it all over Europe and the Miami airport.  Why not do your “gay business” in airport bathrooms.  Well, maybe that’s not such a good idea, either.

So let’s keep privacy private and Facebook social.  Complaining about privacy problems on a social networking site is like going to the beach and gripping about the sun and the sand.

Stephen Hawking says aliens from outer space could be dangerous. Stephen Colbert says aliens should fear us.  You decide!

The great physicist Stephen Hawking thinks our encounter with aliens will go something like this:

“If aliens ever visit us, I think the outcome would be much as when Christopher Columbus first landed in America, which didn’t turn out very well for the Native Americans.”

Talk about cosmic karma!

Here’s what Steven Colbert thinks:

I think humans would have a lot to offer an advanced race of alien visitors.  But much like when company comes over and you clean your house, hide your porn, and put out the personalized autographed picture of Elvis, here are a few things to we should do to prepare for a visit from ET.

Things we need to hide:
All references to anal probes (don’t want to give them any ideas)
American Idol
“Alien vs Predators” movies
Snuggies
Area 51
Karaoke
The British Parliament

Things we need to show:
youtube.com
Glee (TV Show)
The “Galaxy Quest” movie
Chocolate
Yosemite National Park
Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert
Stephen Hawking
Cool Technology Blogs (shameless self-promotion plug!)

What do you think we should hide from hide from aliens and what should we show-off?

This viral video of a robotic mouth trying to talk is really creepy.  But it screams for inappropriate comments!
Mr. Roboto got a real pretty “creepy” mouth ain’t he?  LOL

It’s supposed to show how robotic technology has advanced to make mimic human speech through an artificial mouth without a speaker.  It emulates sounds as air coming out of lungs that gets compressed by vocal cords and shaped by tongue and teeth.

But it sounds like this robot mouth has had a bit too much to drink.  (I knew I had heard those “sounds” somewhere before.)

For those with Terminator-Cylon-phobia living in fear of robots taking over the world, you can relax.  Unless the “robot agenda” is to be weird, I think we are safe…at least for now!

In honor of Earth Day I am re-posting my article on The Green Machine.

Did you know that going green with your PC can save you some green?  By powering down your PC or using power management correctly you can save up to $60 a year per machine.  For the Planeteer that equals a half a ton of CO2 a year that will not be adding to global climate change.  Go planet…and wallet!

Turn off your PC and Monitor
To maximize energy savings turn off your PC and monitor every night.
If you want to make Captian Planet really fly high, unplug your PC and monitor when not in use.  An easy way to do this is to use a power strip (with surge protection) and turn it off after powering down your PC gear.

MYTH – Turning your PC on and off wears it out.
Today’s PCs are can handle an average of 40,000 power cycles.  That’s a power-up and power-down once a day for almost 55 years.  Perhaps at the dawn of the PC era (the mid-1980s) there may have been some truth to this.  So if your PC looks like this

Complete with dual 5¼ floppy drives and green text-only monitor, then you may want to leave it on…or put it in a museum.

MYTH – It takes more power to turn on your PC.
The small electrical surge used when a PC turns on is far less than the drain of a PC that keeps marching 24 hours a day.   I won’t overload your circuits with specs on amps used on power-up vs. over time, but if you think about it, it makes sense to give your PC a rest.

Give It a Rest
Even those with the best green intention may not be able to power-down the PC every night.  The next best thing is the proper use of power management.  Here are the recommended power management settings:

• Monitor/display sleep: Turn off after 15 minutes or less
• Turn off hard drives/hard disk sleep: 15 minutes or less
• System standby/sleep: After 30 minutes or less

Instructions for enabling power management vary by operating system.
Click the below links for Power Management Instructions:
Windows 2000/XP
Windows Vista
Mac OS X

Hibernation
Also, you should enable hibernate.  The hibernate mode only use about 5 watts of energy for your monitor and 2.3 watts for your PC.  This is virtually the same as a powered down PC.  To do this go to Control Panel, click on “power options,” and set your PC to “hibernate” after a specified time (most recommend 30-60 minutes).

Here are some other green tips that will help save you money while saving the planet.
Screen Savers Don’t Save
Those cool 3D screen savers do not save energy.  It is expense wallpaper. If you like fish, put a picture of Flipper by your PC and use the recommended power management settings.

Flat Screen Use Less Power
Not only do flat screens save power, but they save your eyes.  Flat screen users notice less eye fatigue.   Flat screens are easier to move and take less space.  And the price barriers have dropped making these cool looking devices fit into even the tightest of IT budgets.
Just don’t forget to give you old CRT a proper burial by appropriately disposing of it.  Click here for more info on how to dispose your monitor and other PC equipment.
How to Dispose of Computer Equipment

Laptops Use Less Power
If you are looking for an excuse to go mobile with a new laptop, play the green card.  And low laptop prices make this almost a financial wash for the accounting department.

Clean and Green
When you go green with your PC, you also go clean.  An orderly shutdown of a PC allows it to run maintenance clean-up routines that keep it humming along.  Think of it as giving your PC clean underwear.  Dirty underwear is just gross!

There are few win-wins in this world and give and take world.  But going green is one of those no-brainers that appeals to the hippie and yuppie in us all.
For more on going green check out the Energy Star website at http://www.energystar.gov/.

Hot shirtless guys and scantily clad girls running on the side of the road are MUCH more of a distraction and hazardous than cell phones. So let’s pass a law against hot people running.  They’re already hot so why do they need to run anyway?  Of course, non-hot people may continue to run and should continue to do so. Until they become hot, then they must stop.

If I cannot be trusted as an adult to do two things at once like talk on the cell and drive, then I cannot be trusted to not be distracted when hot people are running on the sidewalks of busy streets.

Wouldn’t you find this distracting and even dangerous if you saw something like this while you were behind the wheel?

Your head would be spinning around like the Exorcist to get another look with no concern to your fellow drivers.

In fact, why we’re at it, let’s outlaw hot people all together!  They make me feel bad about myself.  And if my self-esteem is low it will have a negative impact on my driving.  (I’m sure someone has done a study about this.)  It cannot be my fault if I feel bad about myself.  No Way!  The hot people are to blame!  IT’S THEIR FAULT and NOT MINE!  So they must be stopped!

What I really think!
The no-cell-phone while driving is a scam and just another way for local governments to raise money and insurance companies to increase your rates.  We are adults and can do two things at once.

I still like this video from my post Have no Fear, Hands Free is Here!

On 4/6/2010 a U.S. appeals court ruled against the FCC’s net neutrality regulations.  This is a defeat for Internet freedom advocates and Internet users.  But for big corporations, the same people who crashed our financial systems, this is a large win.

Here are two blog posts I wrote about the Net Neutrality that goes into more detail about his issue.
http://www.biologyoftechnology.com/2009/10/net-neutrality-is-back/
http://www.biologyoftechnology.com/2008/07/net-neutrality-is-a-big-opportunity-for-big-business/

Here’s one of the many videos on youtube.com that explain Net Neutrality.

If greedy corporation get their hands on the Internet to impose their will then you can kiss good-bye to the Internet as you know it.  In the world of a business controlled Web then there is nothing to stop Comcast (or any ISP) from charging tolls and fees to access specific websites.  Imagine a Facebook fee added to your ISP bill because you use a lot Facebook, or certain website painfully slow unless you purchase the “gold level” package from your ISP.  It could happen!

Before you start waving your “No Big Government” banner at me, consider this.  We have laws to protect blocks of land as national parks so everyone can enjoy them.  Otherwise big business would have bought the Grand Canyon and turn it into a billion dollar real estate development exclusively for the super wealthy.  Net Neutrality is a proposed set of laws to provide the similar protection for the Internet.  Without it we could see Internet access controlled by big business and special interest.

This is not a right-left political issue.  This is a free speech issue.  So before you hope on whatever political train-of-thought you ride, I strongly encourage you to think this through for yourself.  Be a free thinker and support a free Internet!

Tell all your little friends that the latest viral video of pre-teen kids doing an inappropriate performance of “Scarface” is not a “fudging” school play.  The video (over 2.5 million hits) is a professional production done by child actors with their parent’s permission and is purposefully made to look like a parent taped it from the audience with a handheld video cam.

Here’s the video:

I love the irony that these kids are reenacting a mega-violent movie about murder and illegal drug trade but they still have to substitute the word “fudge” for the f-word.  If you looked closely it seems too polished and cryptic to be a real school production.  And the use of popcorn to represent cocaine adds to the obvious “over-the-top” sarcasm.

But the real irony is the initial response.  Before word got out that this was a fake school play people were ready to go all “Scarface” looking to blame someone for corrupting the children.   I read where someone wanted to start a Popcorn Party to protest the government forcing kids to participate in school productions that do not reflect true American values.

This reaction shows our “War of the Worlds” state of mind.  We look at those poor souls who over reacted to the 1938 Orson Wells radio broadcast as gullible simpletons.  But someone puts an apparent school play on youtube.com and we are ready to introduce someone to our “little friend.”

So what have we learned?  Just because someone says aliens are invading the Earth there is no need to jump out a window.  And just because something is on youtube.com, posted on a blog, spoke by a radio talk show host, or reported by your favorite news network, there is no need to turn into Tony Montana (Al Pacino’s character in Scarface).

Come on people.  Let’s not be naive and believe everything we are spoon-fed!
SO LET’S ALL JUST “FUDGING” RELAX AND STOP BEING SO “FUDGING” ANGRY AT EVERYTHING!  OKAY!

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A Chatroulette star is born.  His name is Merton, he plays the piano (very well), and makes up on-the-spot songs to people he meets on Chatroulette.  Before you hit “Next” on this blog post you should look at this guy.  He has over 3 million hits on youtube.com!

(Warning – this is Chatroulette so there are some “adult” words in his compositions.)

A month ago Merton was just another talented musician looking for an audience.  And now thanks to “viral power” he is the latest Internet crazy.  Go Merton for reminding us of the possibilities of the interactive Internet.

For more on Chatroulette see my post:
http://www.biologyoftechnology.com/2010/03/chatroulette-a-freak-show-but-we-love-a-freak-show/

Since the moment the iPad was announced the jokes just keep coming.  Not about the product, but about the name.  I am actually looking forward to trying the iPad and may even purchase one (scheduled release date is April 13, 2010).  Despite its shortcomings (no camera, no phone) the e-reader, web browsing, and sleek size are enough to give it a serious look.

But I can’t resist the jokes about the iPad’s unfortunate name.  Here’s one-two parody punch at the iPad and Jersey Shore.